Essay 3

Sam

English

Mr. Salsich

9/28/10

My Favorite:

An Essay About My Passions

TS-My favorite place to spend my time is at one of the most dangerous: the river. It is a place that can be enjoyable, but also a place that can keep you on your toes. It is a place that can be relaxing, but also a place that can kill you. It is the river.

TS-The river is where I am most at home, big or small, deep or shallow. SD- As soon as I make my way into the river, the water raps its arms around my waist. CM- The cold refreshing water always finds a way to rejuvenate me, and restore all my energy. CM- Whenever I feel stale or lethargic, I immediately go to the water; so it can work its magic. SD- The currents are always welcoming, but they keep me on guard. CM-The currents also provide a plentiful supply of fish; which I find irresistible not to catch. CM- The currents can be fun, but they are also a brawny force of nature. SD- The river valley can be deep and intimidating, like the drop off from a cliff. CM- They are steep and rugged, shimmering in the river's spray as the current rips by, baking in the intense heat of the day, daring me to climb down and not slip, holding steady and firm like a statue.(40 words) CM- Sometimes, I think nothing can break their form, whatever is hurled at them they can still stay strong. CS- The river is a place where some of natures strongest forces come together to form a place of shear power.

TS- When I am bored, my fishing pole always brings me something to do. SD- During the long summer days my fishing pole is the only thing that can save me from my boredom. CM- I have found that going out on the boat to fish is much more entertaining than sitting in front of a television. CM- Just being out on the water trying to trick a fish into biting your lure, never gets old. SD- My fishing pole opens up many gateways to entertainment. CM-If it wasn’t for my fishing pole, I would hardly be outside on the water. CM- Instead, I would end up inside moping around with nothing to do. SD- Furthermore, my fishing pole delivers me food. CM- Fishing has provided food for people for hundreds of years. CM- Fresh fish is one of my family's favorite meals. CS-Without a fishing pole, my summer days would be extremely slow and boring. Not to mention I would be very hungry.

Being on the river is my favorite thing in the world. These two necessities play a huge roll in my life. Instead of sitting on the couch, I am out fishing on the river. I feel fishing has enriched my life with nature, happiness and excitement. Being outside on the river, with a rod in my hand, is my true love and passion.

I think I did alright on this essay. The only thing that concerns me is my commas. During this essay I kept second guessing myself as to where and place the commas. I think i really need to work on this. Otherwise, I thought my ideas were well planned out, and fit me perfectly. I would give this essay a C+.

Essay 2

Sam

English

Mr. Salsich

9/22/10

Truly Knowing Somebody:

An Essay About Never Truly Knowing Someone

There are always those certain secrets I will share with my friends, but there are a few that stay locked up inside me and will never come out. Everyone keeps certain things to just themselves Therefore, you never completely know your friends. Charles Dickens the author of, “A Tale of Two Cities”, states this same theory. Can Dickens be right?

TS- Is it possible that my family and best friends don’t truly know me? SD- According to Dickens, nobody truly knows each other, “that every beating heart in the hundreds of thousands of breasts there, is, some of its imaginings, a secret to the heart nearest it!” CM- Let it be your mom or dad, you truly don’t know somebody. CM- Every beating heart that sits next to you holds a deep secret or trait that is impossible to discover, except by the person themself.SD- It takes too long to, beyond doubt, know somebody, “No more can I turn the leaves of this dear book that I once loved, and vainly hope in time to read it all”. CM-In plain English, there isn’t enough time on earth to get to know somebody. This one lifetime is a fraction of the time it takes to read somebody’s entire book.(appositive) CM- Just when you thought you finally have someone figured out, you learn something new about a person. CS- I have always thought I knew my best friend like the back of my palm, until I read what Dickens had to say.

TS-Something that can relate to Dickens’ belief about not truly knowing someone is a box of chocolates. SD- When you eat a box of chocolates you never know what you are going to get. CM-A person is filled with secrets and mysteries, just like a box of chocolates is filled with all different kinds of flavors. CM-My favorite part of eating chocolates is the wide variety of flavors, and my favorite part of a human is discovering new secrets.SD-As my friendship grows with my friends, I sporadically learn new secrets and traits I have never seen before CM- If you eat enough chocolate, you will discover new flavors you never tasted before.CM-Even though every now and then you find a new flavor, you can never discover them all, there’s simply not enough time.SD-Sometimes it’s better to savor the chocolates and eat them slow instead of rushing. CM-By eating them slow you will not get sick of them, instead you will enjoy every bite.CM-Furthermore, you never want to rush a friendship and figure out too many secrets too fast, or it will become dull. CS-Getting to know somebody can be a delicate process, but it can also be delicious like eating a box of chocolate.

After hearing Dickens’ thoughts, I too believe his theory. Once I thought about what he said, it made complete sense. Relating this thought to a box of chocolates also helped see his point. A person is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re going to get.

Essay #1

Essay #1
Sam
Mr. Salsich
English
September 14, 2010

End of Summer, Beginning of School:
A Essay About The Start of A New Year

Have you ever felt that your bed is always comfier on a school morning? I get this feeling every Monday morning before school. I think the song and movie I chose explain this feeling perfectly.

TS- For me, the song that marks the end of summer is “Monday Monday”, by the Mamas and the Papas. SD- This song is very interesting because it can take on two meanings, depending on the time of year. CM- In the midst of summer, I love Mondays. However, when school is in session, and summer has ended, Monday takes on a new meaning. CM- During the beginning of summer this song has a nice calming tone to it, “Monday Monday so good to me”. But, when school comes around, it inherits a gloomy feeling, “Monday Monday can’t trust that day”. SD- After the summer has run its course, there is that one dreadful Monday that marks the end of summer. CM- The Mamas and the Papas sing, “When that Monday comes you can find me crying”. When that Monday morning rolls around, millions of kids, including myself, wake up with a puddle of tears on their pillow. CS-That Monday marks the end to freedom. That Monday marks the end of fun. That Monday marks the end of summer. That Monday is Labor Day. (parallelism)

TS- When school starts, clicks form, trouble starts, and kids come together. SD-The movie, “ The Breakfast Club”, resembles one side of school besides football nights, dances, and studying. It resembles “A brain, a beauty, a jock, a misfit, and a criminal”, who come together in detention. CM- The first week of school has ended and already five kids with different personalities are in a Saturday detention. CM- These kids are from every click possible, ranging from the geeks to jocks. CM- In an eight hour day, this unique group of kids realize, they have more in common than they thought. SD- The whole movie takes place in a school library with a passive dictator as the school faculty who monitors them. CM- Throughout the movie, they sneak through the whole school playing basketball, roaming the hallways, and rough housing in the library. CM- All of the scenery in this movie brings a back to school feeling to me. CS-Saturday finally ended, uniting clicks, creating respect for one another, and all were glad for that detention after all. (Participle)

Finding a movie and a song that relates to the end of summer and beginning of the school year was tricky. I believe that the song and movie I chose showed these connections very well. Everybody hates getting out of bed on a Monday to go work. Everybody hates going back to school and seeing classrooms and lockers.

Self Assessment- I think I did relatively well on this essay. I checked it over countless times and followed the advice that my partners gave me. I particularly like my song about Monday. That chunk flowed very nicely I thought. I did have some trouble with my last paragraph. It felt like the paragraph didn’t relate the movie to the beginning of school very well. For my next essay I will think extra hard about my topics so they are good ones.